I've found that i have a very sensitive self-consciousness, that I realize when I'm not paying attention to something, and I feel a need to work on that in myself. This time, it's about staying confidant in God with his story for Alan and I while I prepare for this trip and leave. It seems so ironic, and so inconceivable that I will be leaving everything here, especially the people closest to me.
Now realizing that I find this totally inconceivable in the midst of this beautiful summer that we're having in Indiana, I need to take time alone with God, as much as possible, until Him and I are on the same page with leaving the closest people to me, especially my boyfriend.
This is hard, because I've been so busy with my friends and school since I will be leaving soon, and writing letters to see if anyone would still like to sponser and support me, but the one thing that's kept me whole through this whole endeavor, and will be with me over there, I haven't been spending a ton of time with, which is exactly what I need to do. To straighten everything out, and be on the right foot, leaving my family, friends, and Alan, and going out to Indonesia, a country that I will have to learn the language ,and be on my own.
Please pray that I make time, and am open, because this is manditory and needs to be done as soon as possible for me to be whole once again and know where God and I have been and am staying strong in life and in a relationship with a great guy.
i love you all